OLD AGE
The
other day a young person asked me how I felt about being old. I was taken aback,
for I do not think of myself as old. Upon seeing my reaction, she was
immediately embarrassed, but I explained that it was an interesting question,
and I would ponder it, and let her know.
Old Age, I decided, is a gift.
I am now, probably for the first time in my life, the person I have always
wanted to be. Oh, not my body! I sometime despair over my body, the wrinkles,
the baggy eyes, and the sagging butt. And often I am taken aback by that old
person that lives in my mirror (who looks like my mother!), but I don't agonize
over those things for long.
I would never trade my amazing friends, my wonderful life, my loving family for
less gray hair or a flatter belly. As I've aged, I've become more kind to
myself, and less critical of myself. I've become my own friend. I don't chide
myself for eating that extra cookie, or for not making my bed, or for buying
that silly cement gecko that I didn't need, but looks so avante garde on my
patio. I am entitled to o overeat, to be messy, to be extravagant. I have seen
too many dear friends leave this world too soon; before they understood the
great freedom that comes with aging.
Whose business is it if I choose to read or play on the computer until 1 a.m. ,
and sleep until noon ?
I will dance with myself to those wonderful tunes of the 50's,and if I, at the
same time, wish to weep over a lost love ... I will.
I will walk the beach in a swim suit that is stretched over a bulging body, and
will dive into the waves with abandon if I choose to, despite the pitying
glances from the jet set.
They, too, will get old.
I know I am sometimes forgetful. But there again, some of life is just as well
forgotten. And I eventually remember the important things.
Sure, over the years my heart has been broken. How can your heart not break when
you lose a loved one, or when a child suffers, or even when a beloved pet gets
hit by a car? But broken hearts are what give us strength and understanding and
compassion. A heart never broken is pristine and sterile and will never know the
joy of being imperfect.
I am so blessed to have lived long enough to have my hair turn gray, and to have
my youthful laughs be forever etched into deep grooves on my face. So many have
never laughed, and so many have died before their hair could turn silver. I can
say "no"; and mean it.
As you get older, it is easier to be positive. You care less about what other
people think. I don't question myself anymore. I've even earned the right to be
wrong.
So, to answer your question, I like being old. It has set me free. I like the
person I have become. I am not going to live forever, but while I am still here,
I will not waste time lamenting what could have been, or worrying about what
will be. And I shall eat dessert every single day.
Author Unknown
Today, I wish you a day of ordinary miracles
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